We've all been there. You've picked out the perfect coordinating wardrobe. You have everyone's hair combed, faces wiped and shirts pressed. You're ready for your family photo session that you're paying a small fortune for to have beautiful images for that Christmas card or presents for Grandma. Maybe even for a gallery wall that you've been planning for months. And then it happens. One kid is getting whiny, the baby is tired and completely out of sorts and you see your precious hour (or allotted time) with your photographer slipping away.
This post is geared primarily towards families with elementary school aged kids and younger, but can definitely be applied to families with older kids as well. Everyone wants the perfect session that goes so smoothly that you're done before your time is up, and all with happy smiling faces for everyone at the end. I will just tell you, sessions with little ones can be so unpredictable. Especially when you're trying to get an entire family shot. After being the parent during a few sessions of my own and then being the photographer for too many to count, I have come up with a list of things that I truly believe can make the whole experience more enjoyable for everyone. I used to just try and bring this attitude to the session and play it by ear with the parents and hope for the best. Now, after a few sessions that had us all frazzled, I send my clients this list. Or I go over it with them in our consultation prior to the session.
1. Set your expectations -
This is SO important. Before you even get to the day of your session have a general idea of what you want to accomplish. Is your main goal for the best shots to be of the entire family? Do you just want one good one of the whole family and the rest to be individual shots of the kids? Do you want your photographer to simply capture your family as they are, in the moment? There are so many different ways to approach a family session, but being in contact with your photographer and letting he or she know what your over all goal is for the session will help to get things rolling from the beginning. You'll avoid that 10 or 15 min of trying to figure out where to start and what's most important to you. I mean because let's face it. When you have children under the age of 5, 10 minutes can be your saving grace to keep them happy before they are bored and want to do their own thing.
2. Be realistic
Coming from someone who just wants those classic and timeless images plastered ALL over the walls, this can be hard to swallow. In my experience, it is going to take multiple sessions and a little bit of spontaneity to achieve said timeless gallery walls. If you have multiple small children, really think about expectations that you set from tip one and ask yourself if you're being realistic about your hopeful outcome. There is nothing more disappointing for a photographer than to feel like the client is unhappy.
3.Plan accordingly
If you know that your kiddos do better at a certain time of day, talk that over with your photographer. There are definitely times of day that we photographers like to think is the only time or best time for lighting (which is partially true), but when it comes to working with children, you have to learn to be flexible. Now, is 12 noon going to produce those dreamy sunset images you've been dreaming of? No. But is your 3 year old all giggles at that time? It may be worth talking with the photographer about what your wants are, but the times that are best and you can hopefully come up with something perfectly designed for your family. Or, if you are set on a look and it requires a certain time of day, try and nap, rest, eat, play around that schedule. I would even suggest getting them in the routine of it a few days before. This is the mamma coming out in me, and I know the struggle of trying to get little ones to change their routines for one day. It sometimes results in more chaos than not. But, planning in advance and anticipating the outcome can definitely help in the end result of your session!
4. Pick a style and feel
Do you have a vision of what you want your images to look like? Have you seen something you like and want to play off of that? Do you have an off the wall idea that you think will photograph beautifully? Talk it over with your photographer! We may not have an exact answer the first time we talk to our clients, but getting to collaborate and work together to plan and design YOUR perfect session is half the fun. There are ways we can shoot to make photos look completely different than others. We may use different light to get a light and airy vs a bold and colorful shot. Is your house more neutral and muted and you want that same style and feel? LET US KNOW! It is so much easier to plan ahead than to try and make a picture look a certain way later. Post processing is great for making images look to have a style, but my straight out of camera shots are where I like to start.
5. Go more timeless and less trendy.
I heard this one time and thought the photographer was crazy, but it's so true. If you want images to remain classic and timeless on your wall, go for the neutrals with pops of color or only use the hat that's "so in style" in a couple of shots. I am all for fun and trendy outfits and images, but in 10 years is that still going to be so cute?? I think you can have a happy balance to make your images pop and stand out, but still last for years. I also encourage my clients to stay away from "matchy, matchy". That's the key to staying stylish and classic. There are definitely times when everyone wearing one color can work beautifully. But it has to be a specific style of session and really planned well. I did a newborn session in a family's living room, and they all wore white. Mom was in white jeans and a flowy white top and dad and big brother were in simple white T's and jeans. Absolutely stunning. BUT we were in their living room against their neutral tones and it was a really intimate session. Totally worked.When you're outside and having tons of fun with your little's, use your clothing choices to enhance your family's personality and flair.
6. Just stay calm!
If you have planned everything, everyone is well rested, the day went perfectly and you are still having problems keeping everyone happy. Just stay calm! We know it's frustrating, but usually if mom and dad start to lose it, it only gets worse. Let your photographer help! Hopefully he or she has little tricks to help get your unhappy or totally somber babe a goin. We obviously don't know all of the tricks that you do, so fill us in! If there is a song or character that your little ones love, tell us! I have been known to sing, dance, make funny faces and sound like a complete and total crazy person just to crack one little smile on a 4 year old's face. It's grueling at times when they seem like they're not going to cooperate, but I LOVE knowing that I helped make the session better for a family. I see it as part of my job and take pride in it.
7. Chose your photographer wisely
This is incredibly important. If a photographer is not used to children or doesn't work with them often, they may not be as willing to work as hard. Not because they don't want to, but because they don't know the struggle. Talk to them before you book. Ask those questions. If you know you have a little one who shy's from the camera, ask if they are going to be able to help with that. If the answer is no or if they seem under confident in that area, they may not be for you. It's not a bad thing to ask these types of questions! I love when a client is more proactive in their session and lets me know little things to look for ahead of time. A photographer can take absolutely beautiful images, but pay attention to who the subjects of those images are. If there are no children, definitely consult before you book! Photographers all excel at different things. It never makes a photographer a bad one if they don't specialize in what you're looking for.
8. Let them do their thing
Sometimes... It's just easier to let a kid do their thing for a few minutes. You know the length of time your child or children usually stay focused and cooperative. Get your family shots with everyone out of the way up front, then move on. Let your kids explore for a little bit and get some shots of just you and your spouse, or of the older siblings who may be a little more persuasive. I have chased children around playing or gotten Dad to chase their ball of energy little boy straight towards me and gotten GREAT shots that you'll cherish forever. Their kids. You want to capture them just that way in some shots. Photograph's are used to document memories and you want to remember your kids they way they were. Even if it is screaming for a minute or showing their moves for the camera :)
9. Bring a helper!
This can be such a huge help! Do your kids love grandma? or a close friend of the family? Ask them to tag along and pull smiles out of your little ones. Even just to have someone to keep an eye on them while we get some shots of just mom and dad is a huge help! When we have our family photos taken I always try to have someone there just to call our kids names to get them to look in the way of our photographer. Sometimes kids will cooperate better for someone other than mom and dad and it can really help the outcome of your session.
10. Remember to have fun!!
Lastly. Just have fun. There is nothing worse than a crying toddler, frazzled mom and annoyed dad who may not have wanted to be there in the first place. Try to keep it light and show your family's personality. Maybe give some positive reinforcement (also known as bribery in our house) for the end of the session. Bring lollipops or bubbles and if everyone has cooperated, let's get some shots of that! Who doesn't love a little one with a sticky face from a huge sucker?!?
I hope these tips will help you in the future and bring less stress to your sessions! Is there anything else that you think helps with family sessions? I'd love to hear your thoughts a suggestions in the comments!
Looking for more information on how to book a session with me?! email me at m.mcnealphoto@gmail.com. follow me on
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Wondering where the 365 project posts have gone? I'll be posting all of my shots from the week every Saturday, so stay on the look out! Click on these links to check out
Day 1 and
Day 2
